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Chapter 57: OP Garlic (XI)

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“Hold on a sec little brother. Did you hear anything I just said?” said Pan Feng, wide-eyed, “I’ve already explained how powerful Deviants are, now you want to experience what? Are you looking to die? Just come with us, finish the main mission line and then leave the Scenario, alright?”

“According to your words, the fourth class Deviant, in a Scenario of this level, is only slightly stronger and smarter than a BOSS like Ashford,” said Feng Bujue. “Is there any reason why you can’t kill it?”

“The real issue here is that you guys don’t need to help us kill it, right?” asked Hua Xiong.

Lil’ Tan had been standing to the side with a startled look on his face. He also rushed at Feng Bujue and exclaimed, “Yeah! We don’t need to go kill it!”

“You guys only said that we don’t

to because… if a player goes to kill a Deviant, not only does it not count as a side mission nor a hidden mission, but it also does not advance the main mission at all. Not to mention the huge risk involved, right?” stated Feng Bujue.  

The three of them nodded and spoke in unison, “Exactly.”

“Disregarding possible benefits to Proficiency ranks, Skill points, and such, haven’t you guys overlooked the most important thing a game should provide players?” asked Feng Bujue.

“Uh…what?”

“Fun,” chuckled Feng Bujue. “You’ve said it already too, the odds of a player meeting a Deviant are very low, and it’s highly unlikely for it to happen a second time. But as for this Team Scenario thing, I can queue for it as many times as I want; where’s the harm in dying once?” He paused before continuing, “It’s rare to encounter a Deviant, but if I’m just escorted by two GMs, finish the mission, and then just get sent out of the Scenario… wouldn’t that just be too boring? Even queueing for a normal Scenario and getting destroyed by a monster there would more interesting.”

Lil’ Tan tilted his head slightly skyward, “Since you put it like that… suddenly, I feel like we would miss out if we don’t go to hunt the Deviant.”

“Of course, think of all the people who basically will never meet one; so what if we get killed?” said Feng Bujue. “It’s just like if after clearing

ten thousand times you suddenly and unexpectedly run into the BOSS at the end of some level. Even if you were going to die, you wouldn’t think about avoiding the BOSS, right?”[1]

“Oh, oh! That seems to make a lot of sense!” said Lil’ Tan excitedly.

“This boy’s thinking is a little strange…” Pan Feng whispered to Hua Xiong.

“It’s not just strange, it’s simply that of a gentleman’spervert….” whispered back Hua Xiong.[2]

“You two are whispering right next to me again! Again, what’s the point?” yelled Feng Bujue.

…………

Feng Bujue and Wang Tanzhi were currently examining the scene of the incident.

Atobe-sama and Names Are Really Difficult to Choose had long since faded away in white beams of light. After a player dies, their body would not be left behind in the Scenario. For that reason, if a player is turned into a zombie because of the virus, at the moment of transformation, the player will become a pillar of white light. At the same time, a corresponding normal zombie will be spawned at his last position.

In short, the game company wouldn’t allow any form of the player’s corpse to stay in the Scenario. Either they leave as white light or leave alive.

Without the bodies, it was very difficult to reconstruct the events of the Deviant incident. But Feng Bujue circled around the couch, torn apart and dyed red by a large bloodstain, and nonetheless presented some assumptions, “The pile of bullet shells around the sofa,” he spoke as he sat on the sofa, “indicate that they sat here while carrying guns. Each was watching over a different direction. The monsters’ blood splatters also affirms this.” He gazed in the direction that Lil’ Name had been facing when he was alive, “The Deviant came from that area…” he said. He stood and walked that direction, all the way until the intersection ahead before turning back around. He kept his head down the whole way, observing the ground. “The Deviant should be a woman, at least its overall appearance wouldn’t be that of a monster’s. Perhaps it even looked like a model….”

“You could figure even that out too?” asked Lil’ Tan.

“These bloodstains on the ground are very informative. As long as you walk through this street, it’s very difficult not to leave shoe prints.” Feng Bujue crouched and continued talking while observing the ground, “But there is a row of high-heel shoe prints right here; it’s very distinct.” He raised his head, “And none of the zombies corpses on this street, no matter male nor female, are wearing high heels.” He explained, “Which proves right now the owner of these heels is not here at all. It killed the two players and then just left.”

Feng Bujue stood up and took another few steps, “The prints end about ten steps from the couch; this must be the distance from where it initiated its attack.” He went up the to couch, “Here. An unmistakable shoe print right in front of the couch; this is where she stood when she struck.” He looked back at the ten paces, “Nearly seven meters in one leap. This also proves that it really isn’t an exasperatingly slow monster like those Blood Wolf Zombies.”

He circled the couch again to another side, “Having finished murdering them, she left in a different direction. She stepped in some fresh blood and left a few more prints when she walked away.”

“Jue Bro.” Lil’ Tan asked, “You still haven’t answered my question; is the one wearing the high-heels actually a beauty?”

Feng Bujue addressed his question, “Look at the footprints it left coming here.” He moved back to the side he was at earlier, “These prints came from ‘walking’ not ‘running,’ and they are even less like the ‘shuffling’ of the zombies.” He pointed at the ground, “

“What if maybe it’s just a monster that walks very seductively, ” said Lil’ Tan.

“If either a high-heel wearing monster or a high-heel wearing man… calmly strolled towards you, would you still be sitting peacefully on the couch until it was within ten paces of you?” challenged Feng Bujue.[3]

“Um…” Lil’ Tan thought a bit: made sense to him.

“If the Deviant appeared to be a monster from afar, then Names Are Really Difficult to Choose would’ve open fired ages ago.” He continued, “Following that there would’ve been two possibilities: the first, the Deviant would’ve started to run, rushing over to attack.”

“Judging from the shoe prints, that option can be eliminated, yeah,” said Lil’ Tan.

Feng Bujue said, “The second… the Deviant would’ve kept up its pace, leisurely walking over, and then attacked.” He paused for a moment, “In that case… Names Are Really Difficult to Choose and Atobe-sama wouldn’t have stayed on the couch. They would’ve had ample time to retreat while firing.”

“Maybe they were rendered immobile on the couch by some ESP attack from the monster?” suggested Lil’ Tan.

“Rather than explain it that way, isn’t it better to directly discard the ‘looks like a monster in one glance’ hypothesis,” said Feng Bujue.

“Instead of trying to justify it that way, doesn’t it make more sense to just give up the ‘it looks like a monster at first glance’ theory.”

“That’s true…” Lil’ Tan then revisited, “Then, even if we assume the Deviant’s appearance was that of a female human, again, how can you be sure it was beautiful?”

“Saying it’s a ‘beauty’ is just based on my gut-feeling,” said Feng Bujue, “it could even be average-looking.”

“Tsk….”

Feng Bujue laughed and continued with what he was saying, “That’s why the situation unfolded like this…. The two of them sat here and saw a woman that didn’t look anything like a monster approaching them leisurely, walking gracefully like a flower in the wind.” As he spoke, he sat back down on the sofa. “Just as the Deviant arrived, just ten steps away, the two finally realized that something was off. It was probably right at that moment that they started to fight. But, at that distance it would have already been too late. In a flash, the Deviant pounced on them and ended the fight.” He touched the torn leather of the couch. “This tear looks just like an attack from Wolverine, and the last few prints apart from those ten steps, never showed any signs of speeding up or deepening.”

“And what else does that prove?” asked Lil’ Tan.

“How far can you jump without a running start and only lightly leaping?” returned Feng Bujue.

“At most two meters.”

“This Deviant can jump at least six.”

“Well…”

“After jumping, it used some kind of claw-like weapon or maybe its own hand and swiftly slashed two people to shreds. The blow even afflicted the sofa underneath them.” Feng Bujue propped his cheek on his palm, “That roughly explain all this.”

Lil’ Tan raised his head and yelled to Pan Feng and Hua Xiong who were lying in wait on top a rooftop of a not too distant building, “Two Big Brothers! You have to keep a tighter watch!”

Both of them ignored him and continued chatting….

Feng Bujue spoke up, “Relax, didn’t they say already that so long as the Deviant appears within a kilometer of them, they’d receive a notification from the System and see their target’s coordinates on their Scenario map?”

“I mean this System is really convoluted; why doesn’t it just directly send them the coordinates and be done?” said Lil’ Tan

“That’s why the Deviant is ‘rogue code,’ the System can’t detect them easily. They definitely have some way of resisting detection and interference from the System. If what you suggested was actually possible, then couldn’t the System just call some lightning and smite the Deviant to death? Would it still need the GMs to act?” Feng Bujue, continued, “Speaking of which… we also shouldn’t completely trust what those two have said.”

Lil’ Tan’s expression changed, “What? What did they lie to us about?”

“Nothing like that. Everything they’ve said is true,” Feng Bujue said, “But those two are just staff members…. How can we be sure the higher-ups at Dream Corp. told them everything…?”

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Footnotes:

[1]So the raw says demon/monster city, but from what I could find on Contra online, the enemies are soldiers and aliens and you fight in their lairs. If anyone could confirm this, that would be great. I, unfortunately, never had an NES and didn’t really play any arcade games as a child beyond Metal Slug.

[2]Hua Xiong just goes for a double meaning here, calling Feng Bujue a gentleman but abnormal at the same time. The joke is funnier in Chinese as the word for abnormal used here can also mean pervert

[3]China is really conservative and drag queens are not common.

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